Poilievre jokes “furries and queers for Palestine” at Press Gallery gala

Poilievre roasted several politicians and members of the media during the annual Parliamentary Press Gallery dinner over the weekend, taking shots at Carney, Steven Guilbeault, and Elizabeth May.

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Conservative Leader Pierre Poilievre roasted several politicians and members of the media during the annual Parliamentary Press Gallery dinner over the weekend, taking shots at Prime Minister Mark Carney, former environment minister Steven Guilbeault, and Green Party Leader Elizabeth May.

Comedian Chris Wilson was giving a speech impersonating Poilievre during the dinner on Saturday night, as he routinely does on CBC’s This Hour Has 22 Minutes. Over the weekend, Wilson roasted the Conservative leader on losing his seat, cabinet turmoil, his new riding and being disliked by the media.

Poilievre then “crashed” the performance to give a roast of his own, with Wilson handing him an apple before exiting the stage, as a nod to Poilievre’s now infamous encounter with a journalist at a British Columbia apple farm.

Poilievre opened with a joke calling Wilson the “temu version of me,” while saying that he was also the most expensive comedian at the CBC and the most expensive on a “cost-per-laugh basis.”

He then touched on former environment minister Steven Guilbeault, who resigned from his role as Canadian Identity and Culture Minister last week after Ottawa and Alberta signed a memorandum of understanding aimed at advancing major infrastructure projects, including a potential pipeline to the West Coast.

“I hear that the NDP actually rejected having Guilbault join their caucus, what an ego blow,” he said. “Beggars can’t be choosers, and surely, Steven Guilbeault’s brand of crazy would fit in right between the delegation of furries and queers for Palestine.”

The Conservative leader then took aim at the CBC and the prime minister, saying that if he defunded the state broadcaster, they could always move their “head office to a Caribbean tax haven so that Brookfield [Carney’s former company] could pay for it.”

Poilievre added that another method the CBC could use to fund itself outside of taxpayers would be for CBC anchor David Cochrane to “start charging for the water he carries for the Liberal Party.”

“The third way is for me to donate royalties, and I’m announcing that I will do that today,” he said. “Royalties for all those who copy me, imitate me or steal my ideas…I think Mark Carney is here today. He wanted to have an impersonator of his own, but then he discovered that Mr. Burns is a cartoon.”

Poilievre then made a few self-deprecating jokes about how he’s been told that he needs to become more likable. After conducting a poll to see how best to do it, he was told he has two options: get a dog or “find more meaningful ways to connect with people on a personal level and make emotional connections with Canadians.”

“So I immediately called the pollster and said, ‘What kind of dog?’”

Poilievre then welcomed Carney’s presence at the dinner, saying, “Isn’t it great to have the prime minister here tonight? Right here in Canada, of all places.”

“He’s been dodging me in Question Period, but I don’t take it personally. So, let’s put our differences aside and give him a big Grey Cup welcome, everybody.”

The joke referred to Carney’s recent appearance at the 112th CFL Grey Cup in Winnipeg to do the game’s coin toss, where he was met with a less-than-warm response from the crowd.

Following the applause, Poilievre said the press gallery audience was much more hospitable compared to the crowd at the Grey Cup, which saw Carney “get more boos than Elizabeth May’s liquor cabinet.”

“It certainly has been a busy time for the prime minister in international travel,” Polievre continued, “checking on his investments, sorry, I mean trade negotiations.”

After making some jokes in French, Poilievre closed by saying, “Now, before I take my seat, and grimace my way through the rest of the evening, let me say that I can’t wait to be prime minister so that I never have to come to this godforsaken event.”

He ended by proposing a toast to the Parliamentary Press Gallery, holding a bottle of Crown Royal, referencing Ontario Premier Doug Ford’s opposition to the spirit-maker for recently moving a plant from his province to the U.S.

“To the Parliamentary Press Gallery,” said Poilievre. “Without you, anonymous sources would have to get a real job.”